It is said that “love covers a multitude of sins”… or wrongs….. or mistakes….. or errors in judgment….. or words ill spoken (my favorite)….. the list goes on. I recognize this kind of love in others but rarely in myself. I am too quick to judge, or ‘right people off’….. perhaps this is the meaning of the phrase ‘ he doesn’t suffer fools gladly’….. and yet I am the real fool for behaving in this manner.
I wrote Unconditional Love as a result of a ‘run in’ with a friend. He was our manager for a season and during one disastrous east coast festival our friendship was tested to it’s limit.
To enable ‘the artist’ to concentrate on his/her art form one engages the services of an agent and or manger. The manager takes care of all the business needs and in a happy marriage the two work together to become as one. This was not a happy marriage and unfortunately it ended in divorce….. “but we are still friends!”
It was just one thing after another….. poor accommodation…. badly coordinated transport….. we were promised to play main stage but were on a tiny side stage…. no sound check…… and of course the money….. what money? It was only when I complained to the festival organizers that I discovered our manager’s folly. Some of his mistakes were genuine…. due to poor planning (isn’t that bad management?)….. however he had greatly exaggerated our billing, the fee schedule and all the usual scrumptious festival trimmings that would normally accompany ‘an artist’.
I guess he believed the opportunity of being at the festival ‘too good to miss’ and that it would lead to bigger and brighter things etc etc. He also rightly assumed that had I known ‘the facts’ I would have stayed at home. His silver tongue had convinced me to postpone my anniversary celebrations (a big one) in lieu of a main stage appearance. I had a truck load of reasons to be angry and unforgiving….. don’t we always!
One evening I called my wife and after the lovey-dovey pleasantries I started ranting and raving about our manager . I went on and on…. saying how aggrieved we all felt by his ‘lies’. She was silent the whole time…. no empathetic ahas…… and though I kept talking I could sense I was in trouble. When I had finished my diatribe she said “yeah…. but you do that”…. “I do what?” I replied….. “you exaggerate the facts sometimes too”.
Ouch! I hate it when she’s right….
As one of my friends says about me “Chris never lets the truth get in the way of a good story”.
The more I thought about my wife’s words the more guilty I felt.
I am always so quick to judge someone without first looking in the mirror at my own foolishness.
“You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye”.
I wrote this song that night in the hotel room…..as a kind of a prayer…. and whenever I sing it I am reminded of my own selfishness.
Without love I am nothing.